After an exciting two weeks of March Madness, we are now left with just four teams vying for the title (North Carolina, Oregon, South Carolina, and Gonzaga for those of you who have lived under a rock for the past month). Each of these teams have taken their own paths to the Final Four in Arizona. North Carolina is the team thats been there before and had to play in some high-profile games. Oregon lost a key member of their team before the tournament started and rallied together to pull off a string of nice wins. South Carolina pulled upset after upset on the hot hand of Sindarius Thornwell and P.J. Dozier. Gonzaga set out to change the national perspective of their team and was motivated for the deep tournament run.

All of these different paths the teams took will take up all of the storylines for the next week until the National Championship. But what if we put a little bit of a different spin on these paths? After all, that’s what Student Union Sports is about. So rather than the typical storylines, we’re going to turn these paths into the one thing college students know best: bars. Here are all four teams paths to the Final Four as the typical types of guys you see at a college bar.



North Carolina: The Douchey Jock



This is the guy who is always at the bar and gets all the best girls. Sporting the white tank top, this guy has no problem showing off what he has. This is much like UNC, who always has some of the top players in the nation on their team and has had much success throughout March Madness history. UNC has been to 20 Final Fours, won 5 National Championships, and has had 27 All-American players. Compared to their fellow Final Four participants, UNC is in a class of their own and is one of the highest profile college basketball programs in the country.


Oregon: The Post-Breakup Bounce Back



Not every relationship ends happy, but that doesn’t mean it needs to get you down. This guy heads to the bar after he’s over his break up to go and find something better. The Ducks fit this bill (ha, get it) because they lost a key member of their team from the regular season, Chris Boucher. A defensive anchor down the middle, he unfortunately tore his ACL in the Pac-12 tournament. The stories about Oregon before the tournament centered around how they would respond to losing this key piece. Well we have our answer: they’ll rally together and plow their way into the Final Four.


South Carolina: The Underage Drinker



Hey, we all know it happens. This is the guy who is where he doesn’t belong though he looks like he fits in just fine. Whatever way he has of getting into the bar, he’s having the best time out of anyone because it’s a new experience for him. This is exactly how it is for South Carolina. No one thought they would get to the Sweet Sixteen, and certainly did not expect them to make their first Final Four. They made it, and in very impressive fashion. beating heavy favorites Duke, Baylor, and Florida. What a story it would be if they continued this March success.


Gonzaga:  The New 21 Year Old



This is just an older version of the underage drinker. They’ve spent years having their fun and they are finally old enough and doing the bars for real. As soon as someone turns 21, the drinking world just opens up. Much like the NCAA tournament has finally opened up for Gonzaga. They are a team that has had great success in the past two decades, redefining how we look at mid-major teams. They have been to the tournament in 19 straight years but have never been to the Final Four. Well, this is the year they proved they can make it and they are not finished yet.


Drink up, it’s going to be a fun weekend of college basketball.